Chalkboard Hearts

Tuesday, May 4, 2010


What do I want for Mother's Day??? I always think about this... some years I want quiet, others I want to do something together, with my kids... and still other years I wanted to sleep late (those early years of being a mother to twins). Having the house clean, without asking, would be great. As would, someone picking up all the stray socks that roam my house on a daily basis.

I love the cards, I don't need gifts... the hugs in the morning from Luke are wonderful, and I don't even have to wait for Mother's Day for them. Watching the big boys grow into young men, makes my heart ache, but prideful too. The emotions of being a Mom are everywhere. I want so much to tell my boys... about being good, thoughtful human beings. Treating each other with respect is just as important as treating their teachers with respect. I want them to love one another.

Having 4 boys fills me with love to spare... but it doesn't seem to flow between them. I worry that because they are boys they won't seek each other out like sisters do. I worry, when I am gone, will they meet for holidays, birthdays or dinners together?? Will their families be connected, without the help of Mom.

I have sisters, I call them a lot. I call my Mom a a lot. I call my Dad too. I don't see my husband doing that?? He calls his brother when the Mets are doing good (really good) or bad... really bad. That's it really. Maybe they will exchange email, or a phone call if an important matter comes up, but otherwise... they don't call just to chat. Do men do that?? I try to let them see me calling and talking to my family or my husbands family. We have them call Grandparents, Aunts, Uncles... but will that carry through?? A Mother's worry.

As my children grow, all the Mother's Day past, and the ones to come... I just want happiness, mine, my husbands, my children, and my extended family!!! Isn't that what we Mother's work towards on a daily basis... making everyone Happy??

Tuesday, March 23, 2010


Baseball Season is upon us!! When you are the Mom of 4 boys, it is inevitable that at least 1 of them will be a baseball enthusiast... well, I have 3!! And the youngest has entered the ranks of Team Player!! They love it. We have baseball bags everywhere, cleats in every size imaginable (gotta save them for the younger one!!), random baseball gloves found in my closet, and kids hitting, throwing, and running all over my house (inside I might add!!).

Our schedule is hectic... 3 kids in 3 different age leagues, 3 different fields, 3 different teams and uniforms, but for some reason... practice is never at 3 different times!!! We always have to be in 3 places at once. Then add the Karate Kid in there and you can just imagine the chaos that ensues trying to get everyone where they need to be. And this is only practice... no games yet. That is when it really gets interesting... who gets to go where and when!!!

All that being said... I love it!! Seeing my boys, whether it is playing baseball or karate, doing something they love, is an unbelievable feeling. Rooting for the teams and their teammates, helping them celebrate a victory or grieve a defeat, it is all what being a Mom (or Dad for that matter) is all about!! Yeah, the nagging and fighting to get ready, to eat before you go, to get your homework done... all that comes with the territory. It is the Pride I feel watching those boys, my boys, out there learning to work as a team. Encouraging a teammate, learning that it ISN'T all about them, finding out there are people out there you just got to deal with (even though you don't want to), and not only surviving it, but excelling!! Those are my boys!! Huh, I am a very proud Momma (at least until they break a window playing ball in the house!! :) )

Thursday, February 25, 2010

Growing Up... Letting Go

Today my baby took a tour of a Kindergarten classroom. MY BABY!!! As long as I can remember I wanted to be a Mom. Since I was a little girl playing with my babies, barbies, and then babysitting, I wanted to be the Mom. In college I saw my sisters having babies, 1, then 2, then 3, then 4... I was dating, but he was slow to make the Marriage Move. I held them, spoiled them, and dreamed of the day I would be holding my own. When I finally got pregnant God gave me twins, 1 for me and 1 for my Mother in-law. She waited way to long for a grandchild and I waited a long time to have a baby, so the only fair thing was to give us 2. I thank Him everyday for that act of genius!!! Fast forward... 2 more children later and my baby is getting ready for Kindergarten!!!

We went to visit a friends classroom (a Daycare Mom) and he sat at the back in a little chair watching everything. All I could imagine was him sitting on the rug, raising his hands and participating like these BIG kids were. Am I going through Empty Nest already?? It's only just beginning. I mean Jack and Cal will be going off to Middle School next year. We will be entering the teen years before I know it. We all know how morose teenage boys can be :)

Ryan wasn't a planned baby... not an accident exactly, but definitely a surprise. A heavenly surprise for me. I drank him in. Even though we thought our family was complete, he fit right in. We can't imagine life without him. We moved to NC when he was just a year old and we haven't separated since. He has been home with me since birth. No daycare, no playgroups, no nursery school, and no preschool. I opened my Family Home Childcare and he has stayed with me throughout. I am glad. Watching him today... he has just enough trepidation, just enough confidence, and a whole lot of humor. Watching my boy navigate his way through a new situation was eye opening... That what I am doing is alright. He is learning and is happy.

So, I have my Baby (who, as I know being the Baby of my family, will ALWAYS be my baby) for a few more months. A time I will drink in, savor, and count as a Blessing. I will watch him grow even more, learn new things, and get even more excited about Kindergarten. During this time I will continue the process of letting go... A process I have been having a problem with since the birth of my children.

Tuesday, February 23, 2010

Monster Jam

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We had a great time at the Monster Jam Rally in Charlotte. The big boys really enjoyed the loudness and fast pace, but Ryan really didn't like it so much. He lasted until the intermission and then was ready to go. So he and I went out to the hall and hung out. We walked around, bought some drinks, and then waited for the rest of the family. Thankfully Glenn came out and relieved me so I could see the end of it. After we went to Monster Jam we went to a interesting little set of stores and had some ice cream at Cold Stone Creamery!! Yum!!! I always have room for ice cream!!!

You always have expectations for family outings like this, at least I know I usually do. I try not to, but you can't help it. You buy the tickets, everyone is soooo excited and then the day comes. That is when the whining starts... "What we have to get dressed NOW??!!" "I don't want to brush my hair, why do I have to, I look fine!!" "I can't find my shoes, money, etc..." So, it starts off tense. Glenn and I try to stay calm, we know they will be fine and calm down enough to enjoy themselves. Which happens... we get to the pizza place and we have a lot of fun laughing and enjoying each others company. We get into the arena and someones ear plugs won't fit right, and we have to pout and stomp, someone else got soda and the other didn't, and we can't forget the trips to the bathroom... then AHHHH... it starts... we can relax and watch right??? NO!!! Another trip to the bathroom, it's too noisy, I want that... it goes on and on!!!

But, you see it wasn't just us. It was a lot of people there that day. That's how it is with kids. They are little human beings with likes, dislikes, wants and needs same as me. They just don't have to self control yet like we (at least most of us anyway) do. I keep saying to myself, the joys out weigh the negatives. They do... the hugs, the smiles, the "Thanks DAD!!! That was the BEST!!" the look of chocolate all over someones mouth as he smiles huge!! These are why we did it, this is why having these Wonderful, Bright, Sassy, Spunky, Bratty, Whiny, Energetic, Happy, Healthy boys is all about!!! I am glad we did it, and believe it or not... We will put ourselves through it again. Over and Over and Over Again. We can't stop ourselves, those Smiles are addicting :)

Friday, January 29, 2010

A Dogs Day

It is snowing here right now... I wanted to take a picture of it but when I went to take it my battery was blinking. I knew I had enough battery for 1 photo, so I got up to go outside for my picture. Well, this is what I saw as I stood up. How cute is that!! They are all curled up and comfy together. I am finding the small things everyday to make me smile. This is what I want to remember about today. Those 3 miracles in my life... and I think those dogs think they are people too.


Thursday, January 28, 2010

A Rainbow

This photo was taken when we were traveling to NY to see family. Rainbows hold so much potential. It gives us hope, makes us smile. You stop what your doing, no matter what it is, and look up to see it. You will run out of the house to catch a glimpse. You wonder, what really is at the end of that Rainbow?

God gives us so much beauty. He opens up my heart each time I see a Rainbow to the possibilities of the world. Reminds me that I am just a small piece of the puzzle... but an important piece. It gives me hope that He is working in our world, in ways we can't always see or understand. That we are in His hands.

Saturday, January 23, 2010

Project 365

I haven't been getting my photos on the blog lately!! I hate that!!! This is Shea she is looking at me with her gorgeous brown eyes and hoping I will feed her something. She loves to eat and thinks that she should be fed whenever we eat, or when it is getting dark outside, or if we look at her (that must mean we should give her food) You get it... but she is such a great dog I just wanted to capture that face!!

You will see this face a lot during this project. I can't help it but this is my baby... who is growing up soooo fast. He has lost that babyness to him but I can't help capturing that smile as much as I can.

Here is the Coca-Cola wall at The World of Coke... I wanted to include it here because it is a trip I don't want to forget!! We had such a great time and just allowed ourselves to enjoy each other without trying to DO to much!!!

So, I have been taking my camera with me everywhere... and I am trying to get photos that capture the moment, but it seems like they don't really make the grade when I put them up. I want to fiddle with them, but my program doesn't really allow me to do much. I think I need to invest in photoshop or something...